A short post about Jerry Hirano.

What are we talking about today little fishy?

Guts.

Maybe some brains too.
The squishy and leaky stuff.

Gray matter.

I used to be too fat. Now too skinny. Just Right doesn't seem to exist anymore.

Compassion.
We learned that at Buddha Church. It took me a couple days to figure out what Reverend Hirano was talking about. I had this idiot come into my work who was complaining about our prices and quality of coffee. He even had the audacity to say Starbucks was better.

I was filled with impatient irritation. "The customer is always right. The customer is always right. The customer is always right."
I couldn't wait till my co-worker came in so we could have our routine gossip hour. The only level of communication we have is bitching about terrible customers. Once he eventually came in I was ready to launch into my angry tale. But then I remembered Hirano. I then thought to try to be compassionate.

 

I instantly deflated. I actually felt better. My brows unfurrowed and I felt the anger breathe out of me. Why should I let some opinionated stranger get me so worked up? Why should I undermine his preferences and smite him for expressing himself? He doesn't owe me anything...


I feel like about 40% of conversation is just judging and gossiping. It's become so regular it is thought of as normative and innocent. Why does it take effort to show compassion but instinct to express disdain?

I'm exploring my hands, my breaths. The skyline, the vanishing point and veins. Especially my veins.

Now I'm looking at that freckle under your eye. The pitch of your voice, the grind of your teeth. Why would I bother looking at your veins?

Remember when I spoke of perfection like some untouchable soul mate? The love I could never make mine. Well she's not good enough for me either. My words taste like titanium and I want to enjoy chewing my insults a little longer.

Just Right actually never existed. 

See you,

A&D